November 8 2021

Show open and the Mississippi Don't Push origin

The show opens at the Pathway Studios with the usual banter, then a host shares a blog about making people listen to podcasts ('don't blab for the first two minutes'), which the hosts ignore while explaining their recurring mic-check catchphrase 'Mississippi don't push' — from a young rapper's dad at the Spirit Midwest festival who said 'check, check... Mississippi don't push' during a mic check. The hosts riff on its meaning and mock the idea of piping Mississippi River water to California.

Podcasting tips and show-rename jokes

The hosts read through a list of tips for a good podcast (decent equipment, right theme, quality, balance, SEO, guests, consistency), grading themselves as they go. This spawns jokes about their SEO-unfriendly show name, renaming the show 'Mississippi Don't Push' or 'Maybe Judas Didn't Do It' as clickbait, and one host trying a new microphone.

Mars Hill, past guests, critics, and the unknown-news podcast

The hosts complain about The Rise and Fall of Mars Hill podcast dropping episodes erratically, then reflect on their own guest history: early Spirit Midwest band interviews, guests who later fell away from the faith, one who asked to be taken down, hate comments at the atheist convention, and superficial YouTube negativity. A coworker's invitation to a 'unknown news' podcast built on NPR articles rounds out the meta stretch.

The ex-Satanist's testimony and its ripples

• Could a neutral intro-to-the-Bible class at the library reach skeptics?

The hosts read and discuss a Christian Post article about ex-Satanist Brian Cole, who spent 33 years in the occult after childhood abuse, then converted after finding Lee Strobel's The Case for Christ in his jail cell and is now a pastor. They discuss how church religiosity drives people away, argue Satan's work is destruction not creation, reflect on the Bible's historicity (Bart Ehrman, a thick-accented Italian scholar), muse about a neutral library Bible class, and share a practice of picturing disliked people meeting Jesus.

Do pastors have to preach prophecy and the end times?

• Must pastors teach Bible prophecy and the end times?

The hosts react to a prophecy-conference article in which Jack Hibbs urges pastors not to skip Bible prophecy. They push back hard: prophecy is mostly forth-telling not fore-telling, Daniel 11 is about faithfulness amid kings rising and falling, Revelation is a gift to Christians but not needed to preach the gospel, the Antichrist obsession misses the point ('don't be deceived; cling to Scripture'), and God's foreknowledge deserves confidence not spectacle. Comic bits include the 'church mistress' and kneecapping the Antichrist 'Tonya Hardy'-style with a baton.

Dear LFTP: the affair, the younger man, and the mental images

• How do I purge my thoughts of the image of my wife with another man?

A Dear LFTP letter from a man married 21 years who had an affair, reconciled, then learned his wife slept with a much younger man during their separation — and is now fixated on the image and on matching the younger man's stamina. The hosts are blunt: the fixation is selfish buffoonery, the images won't fully purge, use the thoughts as humility, throw pride out the window, go to therapy, and serve his wife. The Secular answer: she surely has the same mental images; concentrate on staying united rather than on insecurities.

Dear LFTP: no one wants me to live with them when I'm old

• What do you advise an aging parent whose family doesn't want them living with them?

A Dear LFTP letter from a healthy mid-60s parent whose adult children don't want them living with them permanently, fearing a lonely nursing home. The hosts answer that expecting a household in an individualistic Western culture is unfair after a lifetime of independence, suggest separate-but-near housing (a backyard hobbit home, a nearby apartment), note that in other cultures elders still contribute, and advise retooling the perspective rather than nursing resentment. The Secular answer: prepare now, maybe band together with friends and buy a house — 'the old-people frat.' The show closes with the Bob Eisenlauer complaint line and benediction.