Stop Crying! Loving God Without Weeping.

Show open and tonight's teaser

• How do you love God?

The show opens from Wolf Street Studios in downtown Des Moines with a produced intro in which one voice introduces himself as 'Ben Foose' (the transcript's rendering of Ben Fust). The hosts tease tonight's topic: how do you love God. The framing comes from one host's concern that he cannot see or touch God, and from feeling self-conscious next to people who seem far more emotionally demonstrative in their faith; he wonders whether he is adequately loving God the way he is supposed to.

Gypsy riff, carny lore, and childhood carnival jobs

• Have you ever met a gypsy, or seen a TV show that had a gypsy on it?

A throwaway 'Gypsy' remark sparks a long improvised riff: the hosts read an Answerbag.com answer about modern-day nomadic peoples, joke about gypsies in old movies (Lassie, the Andy Griffith show, The Ghost of Mr. Chicken, The Apple Dumpling Gang), and read an Urban Dictionary definition of 'carny' as a stronger insult than 'gypsy'. A host tells of working for the carnival as a grade-schooler in Clear Lake, helping set up rides for cash and pocketing money from the ring-toss apron, joking that 'fortunately, Jesus has forgiven me for all that.' They also take a break from 'Tales from the Past' this week and announce next week's 'Dan the Dunce,' a Hans Christian Andersen tale.

Improv games, Oscar seat-fillers, and award-show banter

• How much does a bearded lady get paid?

The hosts run improv acting games: a 'line from a movie' bit, then an extended scene as a 1930s farm owner named John pleading with his wife Louisa to keep the farm while his mother-in-law Beulah supports him. This spins into a bit about signing up as an Oscar seat filler — the hosts address Dan and Mike by name, joke about sitting in Tom Hanks's or Sting's seat, and debate seat-filler rules ('do not talk to the talent'). They admit none of them has ever watched an awards show, and one jokes about blaming all his misdeeds on a lookalike seat filler.

Movie-extra stories and chat questions

• Would you be in a movie (as an extra)?

Recapping the show so far, a host asks 'Hey, Mike, you remember that movie you were in though?' and the story follows: a Craigslist-found extra gig for a downtown Des Moines shootout movie in which Ben landed the part and the speaker got two silent scenes, including getting shot in the stomach; he and Mike also tried writing the film's background music. He tells of trying out for the speaking role 'Thug One' and losing it to a six-foot-five actor who showed up late from play practice. The hosts note Rick Gray was in a movie years ago and ask the chat whether anyone has been in a movie or would be an extra; Allison and Dan say yes, and Pants offers to play the player piano in a Western.

Grand schemes, $1church.net, and celebrity memorabilia

• Do you have any memorabilia from somebody famous?

A host describes Ben's habit of calling every two weeks with a new grand scheme — rock operas, plays, movies, commercials, tunes — and pivots to the websites he has owned, including the recently abandoned $1church.net, a dollar-donation idea to fund the ministry center. He recounts meeting a creepy salesman pushing a cash-only missions gimmick. Asked whether anyone has memorabilia from someone famous, the hosts trade stories: Grace's Mimi had a small movie part in the 70s and met Elvis; a brush with bluesman Buddy Guy at a Davenport festival; a signed Hugh Grant photo ruined by battery acid; and a Phantom of the Opera poster signed by the original cast including Andrew Lloyd Webber.

Diet Pepsi twins, Dad's bowling footage, and war stories

The hosts recall the twins auditioning to sing 'You Got the Right One Baby' for a mid-80s Diet Pepsi commercial. They then watch YouTube footage of their dad Gary (the transcript renders it 'Gary Pust'/'Gary Foost') on the pro bowling tour in Edison, New Jersey at age 18, wearing a bright pink 'Gary Foost' shirt, before concluding he must have quit the tour as 'the biggest mistake of his life.' This leads to war stories: one host's dad never told his WWII Navy mess-hall stories, which his dad's pastor later claimed were great — 'I will never know.'

Hard question: how do you love God? (the frame-up)

The hosts introduce the week's hard question. One host, self-conscious next to earnest Christians who weep for Jesus, asks whether obeying God's commandments counts as loving God. He reads 1 John 5:3 — 'this is love for God: to obey his commandments' — and asks Dan directly whether obedience alone is an appropriate way to show love for God, or whether something more is required.

Obedience vs. show: the loving-God discussion

The hosts argue that 'love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and mind' engages the whole person — emotion and intellect — and that people relate to God the way they relate to people. They criticize performative faith: weeping at the start of a song, televangelist-style shows, and hypocrisy, called 'the single most prevalent complaint' about Christianity. An extended analogy compares emotion without obedience to a husband romancing his wife one night and bringing a prostitute to work the next; the hosts cite Hosea's marriage to a prostitute as Israel's example, 1 John 3:18 ('not with words or tongue, but with actions and in truth'), and the Colorado megachurch-pastor scandal. Dog-barbecue and 'come be a pansy for Christ' jokes punctuate the segment.

Prayer-room weeping, Francis Chan, and the 1 John recap

The discussion continues: one host admits he wept once in the prayer room with the music cranked up and found it cathartic, while another went to Daniel asking 'why don't I weep?' after reading Francis Chan. They land the point: the Bible's clear instruction for showing love to God is obeying his commandments (Deuteronomy 11:1), and 1 John requires loving your brother — 'someone says, I love God, and still has hate for his brother, is a liar.' The segment closes with the hosts riffing on Hosea's children, whose names ('Not My People') don't fit the stereotypical pastor's family.

Improv scene: the Nordstrom executive, the Jesus meter, and the break video

Improv scene two: Mike is set up as clothing executive 'Mike Fust' (the transcript's rendering) on a late-night call with 'Tom from Nordstrom,' who rejects the clothing line as too risque for a family store; the scene ends in a potpourri-pipe tantrum. After the scene the hosts take a break and play a borrowed comedy video whose point — 'Jesus is not a vending machine' — they rate about 10 out of 100 on the show's gag 'Jesus meter.'

Voicemail bits, impressions, and the Pathway Church plug

Mike does his impression of Dan ('Hi, this is Dan Hudson'), leading the hosts to call the church office and Dan's cell to hear real voicemail greetings — the church one redone by Cheryl, Dan's from 2001, which he vows to redo. The hosts plug Pathway Church in Johnston, Iowa (Sundays at 9 and 10:30 at Wallace Elementary School), joke about bringing dogs and putting them in the tithe box, and Dan runs through Russian, drunk, and femme voice impressions. The chat reports Liz Lehman won the grilled cheese throwdown.

Parenting: sermon series, discipline stories, and dating rules

Asked about the church's sermon series on raising children, the hosts trade discipline stories: one enforces a daughter's vegetable rule with consistency despite a half-hour standoff; another cancels the bedtime story after a bedtime-rule violation. They discuss dating rules: Dan's household allowed dating at 16 only (group dating earlier), with Danielle dating from 16 and Shannon, 13, knowing the rule since she was two. They stress that dads must give teenage daughters positive touch and affirmation so they don't seek it elsewhere.

First dates, Cheryl, quarters, and Star Wars

• At what age did you first date?

The chat reports first-dating ages (16; Allison's 15); the hosts share theirs — one married the only woman he ever dated, another met Cheryl, his second real relationship, after a prior girlfriend played quarters, a drinking game Ben had never heard of (Dan knew it). One host tells Joe Conner's small-group Skip-Bo story. A 'fuzzball' (Star Wars) joke lands on Vance; Dan notes his name means 'God is my judge' and the hosts compare the hymn 'Dare to Be a Daniel' with 'I want to be like Mike.'

Music detour: 'Ben,' Huey Lewis, and the suicide-show callback

The hosts play Michael Jackson's 'Ben' — about his rat — which one host's wife associated with him while they were dating, then a stretch of Huey Lewis and the News' greatest hits, which someone once compared to one host's worship-leading energy. Plugging the website and YouTube channel (with 'Caps for Sale,' the first Tales from the Path), the hosts thank listeners for engaging with last week's heavier show on suicide — 'tough to go from the suicide show to the carnies and the gypsies' — and describe themselves as 'just some dudes that are trying to follow the path to Christ.'

Hot chocolate contest planning

Asked 'Mike, you were saying?' the hosts plan the first-week-of-December hot chocolate taste test: five vendors' hot chocolates, a nationwide-search framing (with a possible shipped entry from Rosalind's Coffee and Delights in Illinois), and the winner sponsoring the following week's show. They debate logistics — no drinks are allowed in the studio, tasters may sit in the hallway — and Mike agrees to recruit vendors.

Psalm 56:3 and 'Ben's narcissist hour'

A host reads Psalm 56:3-4 ('When I am afraid, I will trust in you... What can mortal man do to me?') ahead of the show's traditional closing 'Ben's narcissist hour,' in which Ben replays clips of himself from the episode that he enjoyed — including his Dan impression, which the chat had rated low on the Jesus meter.

Closing: Chatter of the Year, contest rules, and sign-off

The hosts propose a Chatter of the Year contest (prize: a donkey T-shirt), ask Vance to design a show T-shirt for free, and set hot-chocolate contest rules (homemade entries welcome, no roofies). After a Jimmy John's detour, they plug the newsletter at livefromthepath.org, next week's Tales from the Path ('Dan the Dunce'), and next week's topic — 'how to witness to the unwitnessable' — and sign off from Des Moines Amplified.