Wasting Time & Leaving Christianity

Show open and the Nehemiah beard-ripper

The episode opens live from the Pathway Studios in Johnston proper. One host shares a reading of Nehemiah, noting the book reads like a defense of its author, which spirals into a comedy bit: searching for where Nehemiah rips beards and reading a 'bible verses about beards' list.

Helping your wife in the garden and living your minutes

A domestic story — being asked to help in the garden when you don't want to — turns into a reflection on honesty vs. duty, quoting a host's aphorism that you live your days like you live your hours like you live your minutes, so you can 'posture' toward your best self on matters of opinion. The hosts add a joke about lying to the wife about feeding the goldfish: facts must be stated truthfully.

Podcasts, libraries, and why people keep writing books

A meandering bit about whether it's okay to listen to a podcast in isolation or only while doing something else (mowing, laundry), a YouTube thermometer lesson, and the Bondurant public library's overwhelming shelves — 'there's nothing new under the sun, Jason Bourne's already been created.'

The thrift-store theology haul

A text from Ben leads to a discarded haul: two copies of Fox's Book of Martyrs, a hardback Greek New Testament, and Matthew Henry's whole-Bible commentary in one volume, plus a story about a Bible-college roommate who reverse-hoboed, leaving $500 of books behind. The room riffs on Bible-college textbooks being the same books forever.

A discouraged pastor's week and three encouragements

A host confesses a discouraged week as a house-church pastor — no one says 'great sermon, pastor' in a house church — and tells how three people took time to encourage him the same week the Lord delivered a stack of commentaries. The other hosts note that formal ministry feedback almost never happens.

Paul Maxwell's deconversion announcement

• Why are prominent Christian writers and musicians publicly announcing they are no longer Christian?

The hosts read a Christian Post article on former Desiring God writer Paul Maxwell — PhD in theology, author of The Trauma of Doctrine, now a fitness professor — announcing on Instagram that he is no longer a Christian and feels 'full of joy for the first time.' The hosts diagnose the pattern: people hit a rub point with something God says they can't do, and negating God feels like freedom from responsibility.

Hope, not 'you're going to hell'

A host rebukes the reflex of typing 'you're going to hell' at people like Maxwell: it makes the church look like a people without hope, as if God can do nothing with fallen humanity. The call is to be a people of hope — repentance and renewed covenant are still possible — and to recognize that the angry comments serve the commenters, not the person.

Maxwell's follow-up message and betrayal-as-anger

The hosts read Maxwell's response to people telling him he's going to hell, and read the anger behind the comments as betrayal — people who respected his writing feel let down. A host notes the church shouldn't demand perfect behavior from people who don't yet have the hope of the Lord.

Harris, the Hillsong worship leader, and D. A. Carson's caution

The hosts widen to the pattern: Joshua Harris's 2019 Instagram exit, a worship leader leaving a prominent church, and D. A. Carson's warning that public deconstructions shouldn't be handled as good-guys-vs-bad-guys — people may need listening and prayer, and repentance is still possible. One host notes these exits look flippant: 'I'm no longer a Christian. I'm real happy.'

Metal bands that walked away, and integrity

The conversation moves to 2009–2013 Christian metal bands whose members walked away from the faith without saying so while relying on Christian-bookstore income. The hosts land on integrity: it's dishonest to take people down a path and then bail with no explanation, negating things you saw God do, just because of a bad taco, a bad relationship, or a crappy pastor.

Complaint line and the SNL 'Ladies Man' bit

A mid-show plug of the Bob Eisenlauer complaint line (515) 517-0085 leads into a riff on doing impressions for the line — Tim Meadows's 'Ladies Man' from Saturday Night Live — and whether anyone has actually watched a full SNL episode.

Dear LFTP: the crush on gym trainer Pete

• Should I keep engaging with my married gym trainer Pete, or cut him off to protect my marriage?

A host reads a letter from a married woman who has grown emotionally close to 'Pete,' her former gym trainer: longer hugs, escalating flirting, weekly texts, a Pandora's box that could destroy lives. The hosts' advice: you don't need a guy — find a new gym, stay away, stop communicating; stop hugging people of the opposite sex; marriage is measured against dirty-underpants real life, not endorphin-fueled gym banter. The Secular answer asks what she actually wants from Pete and notes 'crushing on a perfect physical specimen is common.'

Dear LFTP: quitting the job without calling out the boss

• How can I quit my job and exit without calling out my bad boss as the reason for leaving?

A second letter: a man at a small Colorado company is quitting soon to live simply and asks how to exit without naming his boss as the reason when asked. The hosts' counsel: tell the truth you can tell — 'high-pressure environment, not a good fit' — don't use the exit interview to vomit everything; a martyr complex helps no one, and most people are partly the problem. The Secular answer advises expressing gratitude and 'exploring other opportunities'; the hosts mock the stock phrasing and note the irony that, 'like our Christian friends,' the man just wants out.

Outro and benediction

The show closes with the complaint line (515) 517-0085 — 'the Bob Eisenhower complaint line' — encouragement to call or text, and the standard sign-off: be faithful in the means; God will handle the ends.