Pet Pastoring and Confounded on Dear LFTP

Show open

A produced voiceover opens the episode, then a host gives the live show start from the Pathway studios in Johnston. Brief dog mention as the show gets underway.

The dog-door rule

A host (speaker-1) tells an opening story about letting the dog in: he opens the door only the dog's exact width and shuts it impatiently, then reflects that he would be furious if someone did that to him — concluding he is a jerk about it with every animal he has ever had.

Phones, fiancees, and a swallowed tennis ball

Loose studio banter. The hosts call out two of their own by name — Dan and Boova — for looking at their phones during the video recording; one host mentions his fiancee is about to go to bed. A second host shares that a friend's dog swallowed a tennis ball whole and is having surgery.

Caring about what people care about

• When someone's pet is facing surgery, is showing up or praying for the pet a legitimate pastoral-care move?
• Do people wrongly assume pastors are available to do anything at any time?

The dog-surgery news sparks a real discussion: would you go sit in the vet waiting room, and should you pray for someone's pet? A host argues for pastoral care that meets people where they are — caring about what they care about. This rolls into the running misconception that pastors are available for anything at all times, and a house-church counterpoint: in a decentralized church, everyone is equally on call.

Vet chaplains and stoplight prayers

A host floats the hypothetical of an on-call chaplain for veterinary clinics, which the others mostly shoot down. The conversation turns to praying for small things — green lights at stoplights when running late for church — and whether that kind of prayer is legitimate.

The $46.5 million medical-debt headline

• Is Crossroads Church's $46.5M medical-debt wipeout as impressive as the headline, given the debt was bought from collectors for pennies on the dollar?

A host shares a news story: Crossroads Church, an Ohio multisite megachurch, partnered with a nonprofit to wipe out $46.5 million in medical debt. The hosts push back on the headline — the debt was bought from collectors for pennies on the dollar, so the actual cost was far lower — while still calling it a wise use of money. A long tangent on the correct pronunciation of 'Buttigieg' follows.

Name changes: a daughter's middle name and a wedding

A host (speaker-1) shares that his nine-year-old daughter wants to go by her middle name, and he is trying to honor it while struggling to make the switch after nine years. A host (speaker-3), named as Boova in the audio, says he plans to change his middle name to Carson — the family name of people who took him in — when he gets married, and asks whether his late parents would be upset.

Pennies on the dollar vs. paying the bill

• If a creditor will settle a debt for less than I owe, do I still owe the full amount — is paying less an integrity failure?

Back to the debt story: is it better to buy up old debt cheap or pay someone's current bill in full? One host argues you still owe the full amount as a matter of integrity; another counters that settling is part of how the system works. A host (speaker-0) then tells a personal story: after his daughter Shanna was born without maternity coverage, an anonymous person paid the whole hospital bill — a god moment. The group lands on quiet, direct generosity over headline-grabbing charity.

Wait, you pay for babies?

An engaged host (speaker-3) has a live realization: 'wait a minute, you pay for babies?' The hosts compare notes on hospital birth costs — including negotiating down a Tylenol charge — versus home births with midwives, which still cost real money. The engaged host is taking notes for his own future kids.

Complaint line and review plug

Housekeeping break. A host plugs the complaint line — (515) 517-0085 — and asks listeners on Spotify or iTunes to leave reviews, joking that even one-star reviews are welcome feedback.

The cheesesteak run and the pope mix-up

A host (speaker-2) tells a long vacation story: driving the family van to Hartford, Connecticut, with stops at the Hershey plant, Independence Hall, and Valley Forge, then hunting down cheesesteaks at Geno's in Philadelphia. The payoff: his wife waited in line next to a man telling a story about meeting the pope in Iowa — who had mistaken Boova for the pope. Word spread, and crowds showed up at Boova's apartment complex demanding a papal balcony address.

Ripped apart about money: a testimony on trust

A host (speaker-3) gives an extended testimony. The Holy Spirit has been convicting him about money: he left a well-paying job he felt God calling him out of, went through unemployment, and now works part-time for a fraction of his old income — yet his needs are met. A big commission check tempted him to wish for his old salary instead of trusting God. Reading the beatitudes in Luke 6 reframed him: Jesus never promises economic prosperity; the goal is to be rich in the kingdom of Christ, not in a kingdom of his own making.

Success is control, and other false securities

The hosts build on the testimony. One reframes it: we measure success by how much we control, and money is just one form of control — which is why losing control feels like failure. Another offers the 'weightlifting partner' image: most Christians do not treat God as a genie, but as a spotter they only call on when the bar gets too heavy. A third confesses to being a control freak who loses sleep trying to regain control. A running joke about Lot's wife and turning to salt threads through.

The pond and the buckets

A host (speaker-1) offers an extended analogy from his farm animals: he waters his donkeys and goats by hand every day, and it would be more efficient to dig them a pond — but then they would stop needing him and forget he also shoots the coyotes and fixes the fences. The point: God will gladly dig you the pond, but do not mistake self-sufficiency for independence. Let God sit in God's chair.

Enoch the donkey and the dumb sheep

Farm tangent. Asked why he keeps donkeys, a host explains they are supposed to guard against coyotes and foxes — though his donkey Enoch, named to 'walk with the Lord,' abandons the sheep at the first sign of a fox. The hosts riff on how dumb sheep are as a picture of humanity, whether donkey meat is worth trying, and installing a well pump.

Dear LFTP: teenage intruders

• Two 13-year-olds forced their way into my home and won't leave — what can I do without getting physical?

Dear LFTP, letter one. A listener writes that two of his daughter's 13-year-old friends pushed their way into the house, raided the fridge, and ignored repeated demands to leave — while he was away on a work trip. The hosts sympathize, share their own stories of obstinate kids, and land on reluctant advice: call the police if it comes to that, try to out-weird them ('Phil Collins night'), or evangelize them with a flannelgraph. The read-aloud secular answer advises calling the police, filing a complaint, and reporting to the school — which the hosts mostly reject as overreach. The audio names this one 'built for Ben Foust,' whose known position is that you cannot go wrong by giving freely.

The kicking toddler at the bounce house

Quick bounce-house story. A host who staffs bounce houses describes a three-year-old girl kicking his shins while her parents watched, and his internal monologue: 'I'm gonna throw this girl in the trash.' He clarifies he did not throw the toddler in the trash.

Dear LFTP: the Michigan sweater problem

• My coworker's college-football rivalry obsession is affecting the workplace — should I recommend counseling?

Dear LFTP, letter two. A listener is afraid to wear his maize-and-blue Michigan sweater to work because an Ohio coworker is obsessively hostile about the Michigan–Ohio State rivalry, demanding everyone say 'the M state.' The hosts' verdict: this is not a real problem — wear the sweater, lean into the rivalry, get the guy to storm off so you can work in peace. The secular answer calls it bullying and a hostile work climate and advises going to HR; a host who has worked HR says not to call her.

Sign-off

Close. A host invites listeners to call or text the complaint line with better advice or better Red Fox impressions, jokes that Santa Claus walks into everyone's house unannounced, and signs off: be faithful — God will handle the ends.